The Best Parts of Perfect
by J Plash
Summary: Bella and Edward share a peaceful evening by the river...bringing back all sorts of memories. One shot, fluff and happiness.


I liked the nights I got to spend at Edward's house. It was nice to be able to talk, and not worry about Charlie hearing. It was nice to be…well, at least sort of alone…with Edward. There were many, many things I liked about nights at Edward's. And tonight, with the air not too cold, and his arm around me, and my head resting on his shoulder, and the Sol Duc River flowing silently past us in the night, I felt like the world had stopped just for me.

"What are you thinking?" His voice was quiet in my ear.

I smiled. "Just about how much I like staying here."

He chuckled quietly. "Yes, I like it too."

It was nice out here, in the back yard of the Cullen house, with the night still and the trees dark and the world full of nothing but us. It was so wonderful just to be peaceful together—to push aside all the worries for once and have a perfect evening to ourselves. All at once, something pulled at my memory. I hesitated. It had come out of nowhere, and the memory was…mixed. But I was suddenly curious, and I couldn't help myself. I tried to focus on only the part I was interested in.

"Edward…" My voice was a whisper. The memory had caught me off guard, and I wasn't sure it wouldn't break.

"What is it?" He could feel my tension. His hand stroked slowly down my arm and back to my shoulder, cautious.

I settled further into his one-armed embrace. "You never…you never got to finish telling me…your ten best nights." I felt awkward mentioning the discussion. It hadn't exactly ended well, after all. But the thought of Edward's list fascinated me, grabbed at my curiosity. I looked up to see a tight smile on his face, his eyes betraying just the slightest hint of uncertainty.

I tried to reassure him. "We'd thought of…four, hadn't we?"

He smiled properly now, still cautious, but convinced that I wasn't trying to come in on a very different topic from the side. "Yes, four." He studied me a moment longer, still concerned by the tension in my body, before raising one impossibly long pianist's finger. "The first night I stayed with you, after I took you to our meadow."

I snuggled closer into his side and placed a soft kiss on the fine wool of his sweater. I smiled as his arms wrapped around me. I liked this topic of discussion. "And the night you asked me to marry you…well…the night I said yes. The first night you really kissed me properly."

He laughed as he mussed my hair. I lifted my left hand a little to let the moonlight play across the diamonds, and he held it up with his own, stroking his fingers across my palm. The wedding was so close now. I was almost excited, despite myself.

"The first night after I saw you again." His voice was low and soft. "On the plane back from Italy. You were exhausted, but you refused to sleep until we were in the car heading back to Forks. The effort it took me not to hold you closer and kiss your mouth and not stop until we reached home…"

I blushed as he let me drop my hand. "I thought if I closed my eyes, you'd disappear again."

He kissed my forehead as I turned to him. "Silly Bella."

I laughed, resisting the obvious comeback—'your fault'—because I knew it would upset him. "And then the next night was our fourth."

He brushed a few strands of hair away from my face. "The first night I had you safe home in Forks again. The first night in so long that I could kiss you and tell you how very much I love you."

I smiled, remembering. "The first night I believed you were real."

Our eyes met for a long moment. I looked out to the river again, blushing at my obvious 'dazzlement' and settled back into his lap, perfectly content. "What's the next one?"

He 'hmmm'ed, making a show of weighing up options. I answered my own question in a rush of inspiration. "Oh, I know. After you made Alice kidnap me. You were…" I took a deep breath, smiling at the memory. "Very persuasive that night. You and your stupid bed."

He shook his head, amused again. "If I buy a less decorative one, will you stop complaining?"

"No!" I protested, tilting my head back briefly to glare at him.

He laughed and sat back further on the grass, letting me lie back against him. "Your absurd objections aside, that one was rather good. Partly because I was expecting it to be difficult and you were good enough to forget that you'd promised me wrath and terror…"

I glared again, but I couldn't hold it. "You are very difficult to be angry at, you know."

"I try," he chuckled under his breath. I brought his hand up to my face and commenced a thorough survey with my lips. There were few things as enjoyable as kissing Edward. His lips brushed the top of my head. "No, the best thing about that night was just having you there. I am constantly surprised by how these things affect me. I'd spent near a hundred nights with you at Charlie's house, you'd spent hours here with me, but it thrilled me in a way I couldn't believe to have you there in my room with me for the night. It felt…good."

I "mmm"ed my agreement a little distractedly, pleased, kissing the webbing between his thumb and forefinger and down across his palm. He ran his other hand through my hair, curling stray strands around his fingers. His lips tickled my ear. "You really are impossibly adorable sometimes…"

I drew his hand closer to cover my face and kissed the centre of his palm, my lips just parted. He sighed deeply, his thumb sliding down the length of my nose to press against the softness of my lips. For a minute I matched my breathing to his, deep and slow, one cool hand holding my face, the other holding me tight to him, laid back against his chest.

His voice was deep and low when he spoke again. "I thought of another one."

"Oh?"

"Do you remember, the night I bet you that you couldn't remember the whole of Juliet?"

I laughed. "Oh yes, definitely. That's one of mine too, I think."

"I never imagined you could do it. You were trying to convince me you weren't tired enough to sleep, and I…" he rolled his eyes, laughing, "I told you that if you were awake enough to do the whole play with me, I wouldn't complain about you staying up." There was silence for a moment as we both remembered. "What lady is that, which doth enrich the hand of yonder vampire?" His voice was musical, impossibly appealing.

"Yonder nothing," I laughed.

He chuckled under his breath, squeezing me quickly. "Beauty too rich for use, for earth too dear! So shows a snowy dove trooping with crows as yonder lady o'er her fellows shows. The measure done, I'll watch her place of stand and, touching hers—" he took my hand and raised it to his lips "—make blessed my rude hand." He leaned forward once more to murmur in my ear. "Did my heart love till now? Forswear it, sight! For I ne'er saw true beauty till this night."

His voice sent thrills down my spine. It took me a moment to find words. I laughed weakly. "Just don't start the sonnet on me. I don't know how I ever got through that night without falling on you."

He wrapped his arms around me once more. "Well, to be fair, you didn't actually get through the night without falling on me…"

"True." I couldn't help giggling at the memory. "But I remembered all the words!"

"You didn't want me to stop." He smirked gleefully. Cool fingers traced gracefully down my cheeks and across my collarbones, cool lips trailing feather-light down my jaw.

"You kiss by the book." I sighed, gazing out into the black, not minding the heat rising in my cheeks.

He propped his head to rest on top of mine, the cool skin of his neck soothing against the back of my head, dispelling the blush in my cheeks.

My voice was breathless, but my lips knew the words without my mind needing to think. "Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say Ay; and I will take thy word: yet, if thou swear'st, thou mayst prove false; at lovers' perjuries, they say Jove laughs." I struggled to focus as he ducked his head once more to trail kisses down my neck. "O gentle Romeo, if thou dost love, pronounce it faithfully." I wound my hands with his around my waist. I could feel his contentment flowing through me. "Or if thou think'st I am too quickly won, I'll frown and be perverse and say thee nay, so thou wilt woo; but else, not for the world." I smiled as I kissed his palm again. My voice was a whisper. "In truth, fair Montague, I am too fond, and therefore thou mayst think my 'havior light: but trust me, gentleman, I'll prove more true than those that have more cunning to be strange." He hugged me tight. The words were not ours, but they were true nonetheless. "I should have been more strange, I must confess, but that thou overheard'st, ere I was ware, my true love's passion." Edward laughed quietly—he had pointed out, the night we spoke the whole play, what seemed an eternity ago, that he, like Romeo, had heard me speak his name in the night before I knew he was watching. I could barely hear myself now, but I knew he would. "Therefore pardon me, and not impute this yielding to light love, which the dark night hath so discovered."

I knew the lines, but they came alive on his tongue. "Lady, by yonder blessed moon I swear, that tips with silver all these fruit-tree tops,–"

I dragged myself round in his arms to stop his lips with my hand. "O, swear not by the moon, the inconstant moon, that monthly changes in her circled orb, lest that thy love prove likewise variable." My mock distress lit up his face.

"What shall I swear by?" His murmur against my hand was pure seduction, his eyes smouldering in mine.

I leaned into him, a little dizzy, my lips almost touching his as I whispered. "Do not swear at all; or, if thou wilt, swear by thy gracious self, which is the god of my idolatry, and I'll believe thee."

His face spread into the brilliant smirk I could never resist. "The god of your idolatry, you say?"

I laughed unsteadily. "Maybe."

I was sitting sideways, facing him in his lap now, my hands tingling where they rested on his cool, muscled neck. He pulled me down easily on top of him as he laid back the rest of the way in the grass. My head was no longer quite working. He didn't stop me kissing him until my head was spinning and my body was burning from head to the tips of my toes. My blood felt electric as he lifted my face from his. He rubbed my back as I lay sprawled, trying to breathe, across his body, my head resting on his chest. His laughter shook through us both. "I'm afraid Carlisle may be less than impressed if I have to carry you unconscious into the house."

I grinned weakly, still panting, too happy to move. "He wouldn't mind."

He mussed my hair, damp with sweat. "Esme would be thrilled. I don't think she's stopped smiling since we announced the wedding."

I laughed, raising my head reluctantly. "But Emmett would never let me forget it." My cringe at the thought was in my voice. He helped me roll off him, into the dewy grass, warmer than his body. My eyes were still glazed over, gazing hazily into the sky and the tops of the trees. Then his face was blocking out my view, skin glowing palely in the moonlight. He chuckled at my expression. "Come on, tell me another best night."

I tried to focus on something other than his liquid topaz eyes. "I don't think…I can think."

He laughed again, loud, free. He sat back beside me. "I can wait."

It was several minutes before I managed to tear my focus from the Edward sitting next to me in the grass and file through the memory Edwards in my mind. All the nights that made me smile. Finally, I lighted on one of the best. The night I gained eternity with him. I tried to put my thoughts in order. So much had happened that night…as I tried to shuffle around the events, I realised it was one we'd already mentioned. But the night almost had two parts—before and after the epiphany that had somehow healed it all, washed away the pain and given my life a meaning again. I considered. Edward had called the first part of that night one of his favourites, and remembering his face, his hurt in the second part, I couldn't imagine them falling under the same designation. I wasn't sure I should bring it up, but so much had been wonderful about that dark morning, and I hated the thought of being unable to talk to him about anything. It was that, more than anything, that spurred me to talk. I propped myself up on my elbows. "Okay, I've got another one. Sort of. But I don't think it'll be one of yours." I grimaced.

"Oh?" He raised an eyebrow.

I cringed, shifting over to lean against him again. There was a release in touching him. I chose my words carefully. "Well, it was really still the first night back in Forks… after…but the second part. After…after my epiphany. The part you didn't like so much. The…the night…early morning…you first asked me to marry you."

"Ah." He was quiet, still. His voice was flat. "Due to other events, though."

I tilted my head back, stretching until my lips could reach the tip of his chin. He laughed once, unconvincing, his body still tense.

"Well…yes…" I couldn't deny the thrill of my triumph that night. Even weighed down by Edward's misery, the knowledge, at last, that it was going to happen, that I was going to stay with Edward for the rest of forever…coupled with the rushing, burning joy of realisation, of the epiphany, of the impossible knowledge that he loved me…of course that was what made it wonderful. I pulled myself upright against him, pressed myself against the full length of his chest, resting my head against his neck. He'd managed to relax, but he stared into the trees, preoccupied. I didn't want him to be miserable, not tonight, when we had been so happy. He didn't need to spend the rest of our evening listing off all his mistakes in his head. Stupid, guilt-ridden vampire. I considered carefully. Carlisle's agreement, and the discovery that Edward might, under certain circumstances, change me himself, weren't the only happy memories from that night. I twisted my head to try to watch Edward's face as I chose my words. "But, also, in hindsight, I…it does make me happy, looking back. That…that you…asked me, I mean. Now that I'm…more reconciled with the whole thing. It's a happy memory." I felt awkward. He still looked troubled. "Back then, I was so afraid the reason you didn't want to change me was that…you only wanted me for now." I looked away despite myself, feeling the familiar lump creep into my throat. "As much as it freaked me out, the whole marriage thing…after my whole realisation thing…did make me a little less scared of that." I grimaced again. "Well, until I had a chance to come up with all the ways you could still not want me forever."

He laughed quietly. "You really were impossible."

I craned my neck back again to look at him. It made me dizzy. "I never deserved you."

He shook his head. "Other way around."

I scowled half-heartedly, and he bent to kiss me, hands at my throat, raising my face. My nose brushed against his neck and I breathed deeply, swimming in the smell of his skin. I wasn't sure whether the dizziness was from looking at him upside down or just from looking at him. He released my face, his hands lingering at the base of my neck. I smiled at the touch of his lips on my hair. My world was still tilting dangerously, the sound of the river seeming louder. I gazed into the night for a moment, letting the memory play itself through my mind as my heartbeat slowed. I frowned. "I wish I hadn't been quite so harsh with you."

He shrugged, pulling me easily into his lap. "It was already an awful night, really. It could only get so much worse. When I said the first part was on my list, I was only thinking about holding you again. Trying to convince you I was real. You suddenly realising, in the middle of the woods, what I'd been trying to tell you all along. And later, just before dawn, what you said…about heaven. About us. You were so…so sweet. So trusting. So beautiful." I tried to turn to see him. Something still wasn't right. He sighed. "Those parts, those are some of my happiest memories. But other things…you're right, parts of that night are a very long way from my list."

I sighed. "You're not happy about it at all, even now? You can't want it even a little?"

He wrapped his arms closer around me and he exhaled heavily into the side of my neck. "You know I do. Of course I do. How could I not want to spend eternity with you?" He laughed dryly, as though the question were ridiculous. He shifted one hand just a little, to rest over my heart. "But you also know all the reasons I'm not happy. I don't need to explain them again."

I leaned back into his chest. It wasn't logical that he should be this comfortable to sit with, with his hard chest and cold skin, but I couldn't imagine anything better than lying against Edward's chest, wrapped in his arms. "What I said that night still stands. There's hope in you. We both know that. You might not admit it, but we're still hopeful. Both of us." I turned my head to meet his eyes. "Always. Forever." He looked away. For a minute, we watched the river in silence. Finally, his arms tightened briefly around me, and I shivered at his cool, perfect lips at my temple. "If it makes you feel better, it's not one of my worst ten, either."

And I was immediately, efficiently distracted. I frowned. I knew I was going to regret asking this, but…after a few moments of nervous deliberation, I shifted until Edward let me twine my fingers with his own. I hesitated. "What…what were? The worst?"

I felt bad, but he'd mentioned it, and now I was curious.

I shivered in surprise when he leaned around me, kissing softly, lingeringly down from my temple to the corner of my lips. "The worst?" His voice was barely a whisper, his face distant, his eyes soft and raw. "You know that." One hand cupped my face, his cool thumb stroking my cheek. "The night I spent thinking you were dead."

"Oh." I bit my lip, understanding the sudden tenderness. I shifted my head just enough to brush against his cheek. He smiled briefly. His voice was still low. "Then, the first night I left you."

I nodded. "Those are my two as well."

He turned me slowly around sideways in his lap, taking my face in both his hands. His eyes were lost in mine. I couldn't help being lost in his. He spoke slowly. "After that…I'm not sure which eight were the worst. The eight worst nights of the time I spent away from you."

I nodded tightly, secure in his soft, unguarded stare. "Probably the first eight, for me. I don't know." Scenes flashed unwanted through my memory. I shivered. "Well, the first seven, plus the night…the night after I…found Laurent. That was bad."

He sighed, fingers tracing down my jaw line. "I'm sorry."

I shook my head and buried my face in his chest. "I know."

We were still for a long moment. I looked up when I felt him laughing silently. He smiled sadly. "Why are we talking about this?"

I matched his smile. "You brought it up." I laughed quickly, immediately worried that he'd feel bad. No matter what I did, he always managed to make everything his fault. My laughter didn't fool him, but he kissed me quickly on the forehead. "Sorry."

I laid my head against his shoulder again and gazed up at the stars. They really were beautiful out here. Forks wasn't the middle of nowhere, but it had a million more stars than Phoenix ever had, and here, out of town... I took one deep, slow breath in and out again. His fingers traced untraceable patterns over my palms and around my fingers. The air was clear and sweet, here in his arms. My voice was high, wistful. "And, when he shall die, take him and cut him out in little stars, and he will make the face of heaven so fine that all the world will be in love with night". I smiled sleepily.

He didn't quote, but his approximation was just as beautiful. "Rather death than banished from your side. Heaven is here, where lives my love."

I grinned at his improvisation. "No dying allowed. The rest of the world will have to live without you."

His laughter shook my whole body. "Sounds perfect to me."

It was peaceful, sitting with Edward and watching the stars. I held back my next question for as long as I could, enjoying the silence. Finally, curiosity overcame me. "I'm one up on you now."

He looked puzzled.

I laughed. "On the best list. I've got seven, you've only got six. Your turn."

It only took him a moment. "Right. I've got one that won't be on yours."

I cringed. He laughed, louder now. The sound released me the way it always did. I could swear sometimes that Edward was in some way capable of greater happiness than other people…just as he seemed possessed by greater pain. Or maybe he just showed joy better than most. So perfect. His voice was magical. "This one is the top of my list." He grinned down at me when I turned in surprise.

"I thought…"

He tapped a forefinger playfully on the tip of my nose. "The new top of my list. Since last time."

"Oh?" I tried to think of something that could possibly have made him happier than my acceptance and yet not made my list. His face twisted into that irresistible smirk, and I knew he was enjoying my visible attempt to figure out the riddle. I glared without any real annoyance. His grin made my insides melt. He bent to kiss me quickly on the lips. "The first night you wore my ring, of course. The night after we told Charlie and Renee. You were too worried about your parents to enjoy it, but for me…it was the first night you…at least a little…really wanted to marry me."

I rolled my eyes. "I should have known…"

He grinned, his happiness at the memory almost tangible. "Of course, my newfound lack of self control just about killed me, but nonetheless…"

I laughed, trying not to cringe. "You were very well behaved. Sort of."

The humour deep in his eyes gave me just enough warning not to pass out altogether when his lips trapped mine once more and his arms drew me swiftly closer. I didn't bother concentrating on breathing. He'd stop before I passed out. My hands clutched in his hair and clung to his back, his closed-mouthed kiss powerful, passionate, overwhelming. As difficult as it made it to keep my promise—a promise to myself I frequently regretted—to wait until after the wedding, there were many, many things I thoroughly enjoyed about Edward's now less newfound, if somewhat reduced 'lack of self control'. Kissing Edward was glorious. His enthusiasm for fulfilling all my wishes as soon as possible had faded back to caution by the morning after his sudden change of heart. But his epiphany about my happiness hadn't gone away. If I'd been more focused on my thoughts and less on the sensation of kissing Edward, the memory might have made me laugh. As always, his slip had shown him how much more he could do perfectly safely than he had thought. And Edward losing boundaries was always a good thing.

By the time he released my mouth, I was only nominally conscious, and way past incoherence. It felt wonderful. His lips moved eagerly, hungrily down my neck, pausing briefly to breathe in deeply at the hollow of my throat, then going on more slowly, his lips moist, somehow soft, almost warmed by my body. He stopped, pulling away slowly, delicately at the point of my sweater's deep v-neck. My skin tingled and burned where his lips had touched. I couldn't focus my eyes enough to see him watching me, but the look in his eyes, the smirking, satisfied grin at my uselessness were engraved on my eyelids where they featured in so many glorious dreams. I shivered again as his lips touched teasingly below my jaw. "You really shouldn't breathe that fast, you know." His voice was smooth, velvet, but I could hear the roughness of his breath and it made me happier still. A distant, familiar, concerned noise from Edward brought me back in the direction of consciousness, and I finally realised that my breath was coming in quick, deep, somewhat laboured gasps. I dragged my mind back far enough to try to avoid hyperventilating.

He laughed quietly as my breathing slowed, and I joined in weakly, significantly short of breath. He managed to fix my eyes, an evil grin spread across his face. "You know, on the thirteenth, when we try…" he paused to chuckle at the furious blush lighting my face, and leaned in to murmur in my ear once more, "When I finally have my beautiful wife…" he laughed at my involuntary twitch, "I don't know how I'm going to stop you passing out."

I tried to glare at him. It didn't really work. His eyes widened in mock innocence. "It's a serious concern…" To anyone else, the sincerity in his voice might have been convincing.

"Shhh." I scolded him, kissing him once more, softly, quickly. "You behave."

"Me?" His smile filled the whole depth of his wide, teasing, topaz eyes, the whole of his perfect, carved face, the whole of his impossibly beautiful body and magical, musical voice and all the rest of him more difficult to describe. "Always."

I laughed, falling forwards into his arms once more and letting him hold me upright. "Always. Of course."


End file.
